Imagine this scene. Your child is chatting away about different topics when they declare that they want to be blind. Now, as a parent you know that there are people who are blind that are very capable and successful. Think Stevie Wonder, for example. Yet, you know they had to overcome challenges and learn in different ways. So, do you try to impart your wisdom to your child verbally? Are you the type of person who will have a discussion and check out books about Braille or Helen Keller? Will you go to a presentation about seeing eye dogs?

This exact situation happened one day. Our daughter declared that she wanted to be blind. One would have to wonder what would cause this declaration and once I figured out that she was simply curious, I decided to seize the opportunity. While the previous mentioned methods of teaching about blindness work fine, I figured we had a great learning opportunity. As I recalled my many fun sociology experiments in college and our flexible homeschool schedule, I quickly made an administrative decision and replied, “I can arrange for you to be blind for the day.”

After our daughter got over being stunned she got excited about the prospect of this experiment. I think she figured she would not have to do anything all day! But what type of parent would I be if I didn’t give her a realistic taste of being blind especially since blind people function in society daily. So, I got two eye patches, from when I had corneal scratches, and a eye mask for sleeping and promptly arranged them over her eyes. Then I gave her a stick and let her go.

She was very fascinated with this experiment as she banged around the house trying to orient herself as to where everything was situated. Of course, the dogs were running for their lives. We talked about how blind people use their other senses more to assist them. So, for example, their hearing is more attuned. They often will feel things around them. They will ask for help or use a tool such as a stick for guidance or a guide dog and so on.

She continued this for about 2 hours and then lunch came. I fixed lunch, gave her a plate and let her go. When she realized I was going to watch a little television she decided to join me. As she arranged herself on the couch, she decided that she would only be partially blind and wanted to remove the coverings on one eye. When I pointed out that blind people don’t have the luxury of deciding to all of a sudden see, I could tell she was starting to wonder what she had gotten herself into.

I explained that being blind is not something someone can turn on and off. So, I told her she would need to use her imagination and hearing skills to “watch” this show. She was bothered at this prospect but I stuck to it. I told her that after watching the show while being blind then she could decide if she wanted to continue with this experiment but not until she had watched the whole show.

So, she ate her food and listened. She shared how hard it was to listen to a show and how she felt like she was missing parts of the show. We talked about how blind people deal with these challenges and how they overcome them.

Once the show was over she promptly removed her patches and coverings and declared that she did not want to be blind. The experiment had clearly been a success. She learned about a different group of people and the struggles they face. She learned about compassion and how little she uses her other four senses. The lessons will stay with her for life because she did not just read about them or listen to a lecture, she actually lived them.

The recent tragic college killings of Monday, April 16, 2007 at Virginia Tech reminded me of another reason why some people homeschool. When our daughter was quite young the Columbine High School shootings happened. I remember watching in disbelief and wondering what our world was becoming. As details emerged I wondered how the parents of these shooters could not have known what their kids were preparing to do. Then I remember hearing of parents who where still waiting to learn whether their children were dead or alive many, many hours later. The agony those parents felt must have been unspeakable as they waited to hear from authorities.

Over the years, I have heard some people argue that you can’t just keep children at home because it “might” be unsafe at a school because that is not how the world works. While I understand their argument I don’t necessarily agree. If a parent is homeschooling solely for this reason and constantly tells the child they are doing so because the world is unsafe, then it will become debilitating for the child and is unhealthy. But the reality is that schools are not safe. Remember Platte Canyon High last fall amongst others? Then there are other safety issues such as bullying, gangs and so on.

Another factor often overlooked is that in a school setting, children are trained to be very submissive to authority figures, such as teachers. If a gunman came into a place of work, adults would take cover, run and do anything necessary to survive. They would not wait for their boss to tell them what to do. This was evidenced by the adults at Virginia Tech who started jumping out windows to escape.

The truth is that there are no guarantees in life. But it is also true that that the likelihood of a random gunman walking into your home, while you’re homeschooling, is very minimal. Another reality for us is that we have always taught our daughter, via TaeKwonDo and conversations, that you never look for trouble but if trouble comes looking for you then you do whatever is necessary to defend yourself and be safe.

The reality is that schools are not safe and there are no guarantees in life, but by homeschooling we have a little more control over the safety of our home and family. And for that, I will give thanks and be sure to hug everyone in the family a little closer tonight as I remember the victims of school violence.

Oh no, I can’t speak in front of a group of people! What will they think of me? Will they laugh at me? Will they like what I say? What do you think of when you hear “public speaking”?

Most people become nervous or frightened. In high school, I joined the Debate Team. It was an excellent opportunity for me to hone my debate skills, become comfortable in front of people, both unfriendly and friendly, and just in general learn that most folks don’t bite. I have used my skills at various times in my life, everything from making announcements at a party to speaking before legislators at a public hearing and everything in between.

As I mentioned in Don’t You Want to be a HAM?, we are amateur radio operators. Our daughter is also a Brownie in the Girl Scouts. So, what would any self-respecting Mom do when she realized there was a HAM radio patch for Girl Scouts? You guessed it. I volunteered for US, yes that would be myself, my husband and our daughter, to teach the Brownies, Juniors, Cadettes and Seniors about Ham Radio so they could all earn this patch. Since our daughter got her HAM license she met all the requirements and had already received her patch.

The requirements we were teaching are listed at Ham Radio Patch. We decided to divide up the requirements so that each of us would have an opportunity to present. Of course, half of a presentation is being prepared and the other half is staying calm. So, my husband and I helped our daughter prepare her presentation. Her speech was double spaced, listed what she would say, what was on the handout for the girls, and even included a quiz item.

As the day approached, she practiced giving her presentation to each of us. Each time we would offer her compliments on things she did well and suggestions to make it even better. Since she was going to be teaching 25 girls, we had a discussion about how she needed to speak clearly, look up at the girls, pause when she asked a question, decide how many girls to call on for an answer and so on.

Each time she practiced she improved. On the day of the presentation, we went to lunch and over lunch my husband and I each shared some final ideas. My husband pointed out that it was critical that she speak loudly otherwise the girls would not pay attention if they could not hear her. I encouraged her to smile and have fun.

At age 9, our daughter did her first real public speaking gig. She did great! All the girls learned about ham radio, they earned their patch and our daughter got to experience not only teaching others and helping them learn but she experienced speaking in front of a group of people. Because there was no grade tied to the presentation she just focused on doing the best she could rather then worrying about a single person making an arbitrary grade. She read the audience appropriately, engaged them, encouraged them, and had fun. I’m looking forward to her giving more speeches in the future.

Over the Easter weekend, we decided to have calm family time and play some games. One of my old, old games is Bargain Hunter. The game came out in the 1980s just as credit cards were becoming increasingly popular. Does anyone remember the old bulky metal credit card imprint sliding machines? You know the ones where they would take your credit card place it in the machine put the carbon copy receipt on top and swish, swish and then the credit card number would be imprinted on the receipt for the charge.

Well, this game has a plastic version of that machine. The idea with Bargain Hunter was the first person who bought all 17 or so items on a shopping list with no debt won. Of course there are typical expenses that sap your cash such as visits to the auto mechanic and doctor. As we played the game, our daughter was faced with a challenge of either waiting to buy an item or charging the item and paying 10% interest.

Her immediate reaction was that she was going to charge the item but when we pointed out that for that $300 item she would have to pay $30 interest every time she passed payday, she reanalyzed her options.

She said she thought interest could only be given for savings accounts. We had a homeschool teaching moment as we proceeded to explain how many people end up in serious debt because of the very high interest rates and that if you don’t have the money to buy something then you probably shouldn’t.

My husband explained how there are only a couple times when borrowing money makes sense. One case when borrowing is justified is if you are buying a tangible appreciable asset such as a house or when you need cash flow to build a business. Of course, these examples also included lessons on borrowing only what you can afford and not just what someone says is ok for you to borrow. We talked about the folks who are in a bind now because they chose variable interest rate loans, what variable interest rates are and how to address this problem.

Once she realized that interest could be charged for borrowed money and how it worked, a very bright bulb went off in (and over) her head. In the end, she won with all the items purchased, no debt and an economics lesson taught one-on-one.

No, I’m not talking about dressing up like a cooked pig. And I’m not talking about being the life of a party, as in hamming it up. I’m talking about Amateur Radio, of course!

HAM is another name for Amateur Radio operators and my husband has been a HAM since he was 11. Yup, you read that right. He has been encouraging me for years, even while we dated, to become a HAM too.

Amateur Radio is a form of communication that has been around for over 100 years. In order to use the radio bands dedicated to Amateur Radio you must take a test, pass it, and get a license from the Federal Communications Commission (FCC). Amateur Radio is a hobby that can be used to help people in times of crisis and emergency, such as Hurricane Katrina. In fact, a local HAM where we live helped save some stranded people from Hurricane Katrina. She did this while in her home in the north AND while being blind. During Sept. 11 when all the cellphones became inoperable, HAMS were able to provide communications. Amateur Radio can also be used to pass messages, teach about the science of electronics, help in the community, prepare for emergencies, and for plain old talking.

Off and on for 10 years, I struggled with some of the aspects of electronics and, while I thought Amateur Radio was interesting, I figured in case of an emergency I had my husband to bail us out. BUT…when my husband decided to teach a HAM radio class, I realized this whole HAM thing was going to come to a head!

We decided that our daughter, at age 8, might be a little too young for his class and that he would teach her one-on-one. Soon, we heard of a fellow homeschooler in our group who got his Amateur Radio license when he was just 6! Yes, you read THAT correctly. I thought my husband was brilliant at age 11 but now I was staring at a 6 year-old each week that had his license. There is nothing like a 4’ reality check to make you realize that if a 6 year-old could get his license then either this whole licensing by the FCC could not possibly be that hard or I really was seriously electronically challenged.

And so my daughter and I became HAM radio students together. What an experience! My husband would teach something and I would harken back to my school days and insist that I needed to know and understand every single part of what he was explaining immediately, even if the explanation was in the coming paragraphs. Meanwhile, my daughter would patiently watch as I tried to get the concepts. After awhile my excessive questions become irritating to her because she wanted to move forward and not keep repeating the same things for my benefit.

Our local HAM radio club teaches a Technician class (a type of FCC Amateur Radio license which was our goal) and we decided it might be best for us to take this three-week class. So, we went and in between classes we studied. We made flash cards and my daughter and I would quiz each other.

For three weeks, I learned more about amps, ohms, currents, voltage, antennae, etc. than I ever cared to know in my life. I made my husband swear that if we got our license we would HAVE to use it and not just for emergencies. I figured if we used it for different HAM events, contests or public service activities then we wouldn’t lose what we learned.

Soon, the test day arrived. We came with our pencils and other required documents and took our test. Needless to say, we both passed our test and got our license. I’m KB1NQN and our daughter is KB1NQO, simply because of the order they graded our tests.

Within a couple days of our daughter getting her license she marched in the Memorial Day Parade with her Brownie troop. She took her HAM radio and checked in with us several times along the parade route. She enjoyed her independence and I enjoyed being able to check in on her all while relaxing along the parade route.

While this was a great opportunity to learn about electronics, it was a good learning experience for all of us. We worked together as a family to learn about a hobby that we could all participate in while becoming prepared should an emergency occur.

Since we got our licenses we have participated in many different activities. I would encourage you to get your HAM license. To learn more about Amateur Radio and clubs near you visit the American Amateur Radio Relay League at http:www.arrl.org/. Who knows when you might be in the middle of an emergency and you could be the one that makes a lifesaving contact?

Part of the requirements to adopt from Ukraine is the judge wants to see proof that you have a residency. So, if you rent you need to show proof of a lease and if you own your home they want to see a notarized copy of the deed to your home.

Enter another homeschool lesson. My daughter and I set out to our town clerk to obtain several copies of the deed to our home because we are hoping to adopt a sibling pair and need the copies for the dossiers. (And an extra copy should anyone lose a copy of the deed.)

I expected that we would walk in to the town clerk’s office, request the information, they would pull the book, copy it, notarize it and then we would pay and be done. What a surprise when the clerk told us to go to the vault and look it up ourselves. Huh?

The look of dumbfoundedness on my face must have been pretty clear because the clerk then proceeded to explain the steps. I took a deep breath and realized I was going to experience this homeschool lesson first hand, side-by-side with my daughter.

So, walked into the vault and found a locked area that contained all of our town’s vital statistics, such as the births, deaths and marriages. As we looked in awe at books dated back to the 1800s, I could tell this was going to turn out to be a pretty cool experience.

As most parents know, I could have completed the task in a record 10 minutes but realized that this would be a great hands-on learning opportunity for our daughter and quickly determined she needed to perform the task. (Did I mention I had no clue how to do this search?)

We located a large book that listed all the home owners in town. Our daughter looked up our last name, first name and street and identified the book that our deed was located in. We then walked around the vault a couple times as we tried to orient ourselves with how the books were arranged. Once we figured out the order, our daughter quickly located the book volume that contained our deed and then found the pages of our deed. Wow!

In a short period of time she had found the deed to our home and a new interest was seriously sparked. We proceeded to copy the deed, have it notarized and pay for the copies. Throughout this part of the process, she kept asking if we could go back in the vault. Through several questions she realized that we could go back and search our home’s previous owners, see how much they had paid for it and so on.

As our daughter asked questions, the clerks could overhear our conversation. Soon one of them offered some information on how to do title searches in the vault and I realized there was a serious field trip opportunity here. I learned that Town Clerk does field trips for the local kids to the vault and explains the clerk’s job, the records and other interesting facts. So, what would any self-respecting mom, specifically a homeschool mom, do but realize that we need another field trip to the town clerk’s office with some friends.

Don’t underestimate your local town resources. Children can learn about the history of their town and home. They can learn about economics and inflation as they identify home prices over the years, legal documents as they see how deeds are written and notarized, how to do research and of course, communication by asking for help from the clerks. This unplanned errand turned into a great educational experience.

He’s the winner, no she did better. The day after a political debate you will always hear the political pundits debating about who the winner of the debate is, but what does your kid think?

We recently watched part of a congressional political debate. I explained the format for this formal way of arguing. As with any communication, there is much more than just the words involved. Appearance and body language, particularly in debates, are very important aspects. As we watched the debate I asked who was making a better impression. Why? Was it because of their clothes? Their tan? The way they held their hands? What made her feel more confident in that person?

Then we talked about the questions. The debate we happened to watch was sponsored by a medical association. As a result all the questions involved medicine, malpractice insurance and doctors. As we watched we discussed why those were issues for that segment of the population. I asked why everything involved medical questions? What was a sponsor?

As the candidates answered the questions we discussed their answers. One candidate kept talking about how wonderful the state legislature was while the other talked about congress. So, I posed the following questions. Why would someone vote for the candidate that keeps saying how great the legislature is doing when this is a congressional position? Would you vote for someone that did not understand the difference between congress and the state legislature? Would you vote for someone that kept praising another political area instead of talking about what they would do if elected?

My goal through it all was for our daughter to analyze the debate, critically think about the answers, see how they looked at the future, how these candidates solved problems, the different aspects of communication and why it all matters. If more people did this you would not hear Monday morning quarterbacks three months later complaining about their newly elected representatives. As one of the greatest countries we have serious responsibilities to not just vote but to vote intelligently and teach our children to do the same.

Alright, if you’re like most folks, by now you are getting tired of the mudslinging that you are witnessing courtesy of every politician that wants your vote in November. The next couple weeks will only get worse with the upcoming elections. But every time you hear a radio political campaign ad, or see one on television or in print do you just gloss over it? Do your eyes glaze and you start daydreaming you are in Bermuda? Do you wish it would all end sooner than later? Or, do you see this an awesome opportunity for homeschooling?

If you are like me, you seize the opportunity for some good old political analysis. I know it sounds weird, but as a Political Science major I always find this time period fascinating. So, besides enjoying food, geography, history and cultures I also happen to enjoy politics. For some this might seem like the height of absurdity but politics is as much about life as any other subject. In fact, politics determines in many ways how you live your life since politics affects the laws that govern you. In addition, politics at its core is about people, compromises and communication.

If you understand the U.S. Constitution, then you can analyze the campaign promises and discuss whether what they are promising is even feasible. When an ad attacks the incumbents voting record you could check out the voting record of the candidate. Perhaps there was some pork in the bill and that is why they voted against it.

Heck, you can have great discussions with a child of any age. What is pork when it comes to legislation? Is it really a pig? What is a candidate? How do they become one? What is a party primary? Why is there a convention? What is a third party candidate? How does one become an incumbent?

For younger children you could just point out the yard signs and analyze the colors. Which ones grab your attention more? Why? Do they tell you anything about the person running for office?

As they get older you could have a discussion about what it means to be a Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, Socialist and Communist. Give examples of where each party stands on issues they understand and that are age appropriate. For example, they will grasp topics such as the environment, local issues such as libraries, and whether they support the family.

For older kids, you can ask them to read an article or two about the campaigns each day. Perhaps assign or recommend that they follow a particular campaign for about 6 weeks. Ask questions and see if they can figure out the answers. Kids are very resourceful.

There are many ways political campaign ads can be incorporated into learning about government, politics, communication, advertising, writing, reading, critical thinking, analysis, statistics, debate skills, campaigning strategies, and much more.

So, next time you see a political campaign ad don’t tune out. Engage your child. Don’t underestimate your child. They get more than you can imagine. And you will get something too. The opportunity to become a better informed voter while teaching your child.

Living in an age of Global Positioning Systems (GPS) and the American Automobile Association (AAA) people rarely pull out maps, plan a route on their own and use a map to get to their destination. And now with unlimited calling for phones it is not uncommon to call your destination and get directions. Yet, knowing how to read a map and locate one’s way in the world are not just skills that are useful but necessary. Let’s face it, the last time I checked there was no GPS for the mall map. Just kidding!

Our daughter enjoys learning about maps, geography and practicing her map skills. While she can always practice her skills with a workbook, what better way to utilize her map skills than to guide us to our vacation destination. Vacation, you say? Yes. Now, I do have to admit that allowing an eight year-old to map out a route, plan turn-by-turn directions and then navigate you will most likely take you longer. This requires patience on your part, guidance for your child and time. There is no doubt a GPS or AAA map could quickly guide you to a highway or at least the most direct route much more efficiently. Yet, how would this really help your child?

So, it was with this attitude that my husband and I invited our daughter to determine what route we would use to get to our vacation destination. This homeschool lesson is definitely one that is wise to employ during vacation as it can take longer for both the planning and execution versus if you just drove to your destination. Our normal 1 ½ hour trip took almost 2 hours and the route planning took an additional ½ hour.

After she highlighted which route we would take she wrote out turn-by-turn directions. She even estimated the number of miles it would take for us to arrive. As we jumped from one route to another we took in the colorful autumn scenery. She confidently directed my husband turn-by-turn, while she learned the difference between junction, highway, route and street signs.

This real-world homeschool opportunity is not difficult but it is unique. Think about it. How many children do you know get to guide their parents anywhere? How many children get to use their map skills in real life? Not many. And yet, if they did, if children had a real reason to learn to read a map, wouldn’t they?

All-in-all our map skills maven did a great job. We arrived at our destination relaxed and ready for a vacation. She was able to modify her directions as needed and practiced her communication, math, writing and map reading skills. We discussed the importance of being able to read a map and stay focused when traveling so that you arrive where you want and not in Kalamazoo. And her reward, and ours, was not a check mark on her paper or a letter grade it was an actual vacation! Not bad, I have to say.

When our daughter was learning to write, I figured one of the best ways to encourage her was to purchase some stationary and stamps of her selection. My thought was then she would have all the tools to write to her grandparents. This worked out better than I had intended.

After she would write her letter, she would come to me for me to address the envelopes. I quickly saw this as another real world learning opportunity. So, I explained how to address the envelopes. Why they were addressed that way and what happened when mail was returned.

I remember in school learning about how to address envelopes but we always just wrote down the answer on notebook paper or on a copy of an envelope but never on the real thing. Additionally, the feedback we received was very limited since the only person giving feedback was our teacher.

So, with these experiences in hand I decided to approach this a bit differently. I drew lines on the envelopes of where everything went. (You can also purchase envelopes with lines or get stickers with lines on them and place them on the envelope to guide your child.) Then I provided her with the individual’s address and encouraged her to write neatly. I explained that we would know if she wrote neatly if the postal worker could read her handwriting. If the postal worker could, then the letter would be allowed to be sent, if not then she would need to rewrite the envelope.

Our daughter eagerly set out to address her envelope, stamp it and seal it. When we ran our errands that day we stopped at the post office, went in and waited our turn. When she approached the counter, she asked the postal worker, “Can you read this?” The postal worker seemed a bit confused and so I explained that she was learning about how to address a letter properly and she wanted to mail the letter. I further explained that our agreement was she could only mail the letter if the postal worker could read the addresses.

The postal worker was great. He immediately took the letter, seriously looked at it, read it out loud and declared he could accept the letter to be mailed. Our daughter was so excited that she had succeeded in officially addressing and mailing her own letter.

To this day, she takes great pride in addressing her envelopes. She understands the process of mailing a letter and the importance of writing clearly.

Terrible or Terrific Twos (Teens)?

If you have a two year-old, are they experiencing their terrible or terrific twos? If you don’t have a two year-old take a moment and think back to this time. If you ask most parents or read anything about two year-olds everything seems to be negative. In fact you would think there is a special entity called the two year-old monster. But the question is this: Is the two year-old really terrible or is your approach to them terrible?

Let’s face it we have all had our perceived perfect days. Close your eyes and imagine your perfect day. You know the one I am talking about where you get everything done you set out to do. Nothing goes wrong, the weather is great and you even get a couple extra things accomplished that you had on your to do list for sometimes.

Now close your eyes and imagine your worst day. Close your eyes and imagine everything going wrong. You know the type of day where everything is a crisis, nothing goes right, you get nothing done and even the weather is horrible.

So, what is the difference between the two. While I would agree that some of it is outside of your control, such as the weather, much of it is within your control. The single factor that you have complete control over in each situation is your perception and thereby your approach. I’ll share a story.

A couple months prior to my husband and I marrying we purchased a house. We worked on it in preparation for our wedding and for us to live there. The day of our wedding, I had my bridesmaids there preparing. Our wedding flowers were in our basement because it was cooler there. As my sister showered, I went to get the flowers and found water coming out of a pipe into the basement. After I grabbed trash cans and buckets to catch the water, I ran up and told my sister she had to end her shower because water was coming out in the basement. She got out and I called my husband-to-be. During that time, the toilet got flushed and backed up, among other challenges that ensued that morning before even getting to the church. Needless to say, I had planned for a leisure bridal preparation that did not include mopping up toilet water like Cinderella.

Yet, the funny thing is when I look back over my life, my wedding day is definitely one of my highlights. We pledged our love to each other, got married, enjoyed family and friends and had a terrific day together, even if the priest referenced our water challenges in her sermon. So, why wasn’t my wedding day ruined? Why, because of my perception and approach to the challenges that cropped up on our wedding day.

The same thing goes for two year-olds. If you keep saying in your mind that my child is in the terrible twos, you will not only speak it into existence but you will approach every interaction with your child as though it is a terrible experience. On the other hand, if you only use terrific, as my husband thankfully insisted we do with our daughter, to describe your two year-old then you will have a terrific experience. You will approach your interactions with a positive attitude which will allow you to recognize the good in each experience.

With this approach you will realize that your child is not trying to be terrible but rather understand boundaries. They want to see if you are serious, and see if you really love them, since boundaries equal love to children. This doesn’t mean that you need to yell or freak out to establish boundaries rather they just need calm consistency and a reminder of what the outcome will be should they make particular decisions.

So, whether you have a two year-old, a teen or a spouse remember that your perception of them and the approach you employ to interact with them will determine how positive or negative your experience will be.

As a child I remember learning about money two ways. One was the formal way at school. We would sit at our desk, pull out our book and look at a page with pictures of the fronts and backs of coins and bills. Then we would do math problems with the pictures of the money for classwork or homework.

Now, as a child I saw several problems with this method of learning about money. First, it was not realistic because all the money was flat as a pancake on the page. Second, I could not get a real sense of the size of the money because I literally could not get my fingers wrapped around the money. Third, I had no real world context in which I could use my skills. Fourth, let’s be honest about this one, it wasn’t my money so who really cared if I got the answer right?

Thankfully, my mother had a creative way to teach money to me that made it very real, very fast. Whenever we would go to a store, while I was learning about money, she would pay a little bit more and get change. Then, while we were still in the store, she would put the coins in my hands and tell me that if I could figure out the exact amount of the change on the first try then I could keep it. Whoa! For a kid, that was one very cool deal.

While I definitely grasp that schools might not be able to implement this idea this is definitely something that parents can do on their own. My mother succeeded in allowing me to use real money so that I could wrap my fingers around them and relate their size and texture to this subject. She gave me a real world context and she succeeded in making me care about getting the right answer. After all, we were now talking about what could be MY money.

Some of you might not agree with this method so I encourage you to think back to when you were trying to learn a skill, maybe cooking. Remember how reading about cooking was never the same as once you got to practice what you read in the kitchen? Learning about money is no different.

During that time period, I probably earned less than $10 but it cemented in my mind how to count money correctly and why it was an important lesson to learn. And frankly, it was fun!

The recent Representative Foley scandal in Congress reminded me of the importance of a lesson that I was taught and passed on quite effectively to our daughter. If people were not blinded by one’s title or position, then people would not tolerate unacceptable behavior and they would not be uncomfortable speaking their mind.

Growing up as a military brat, I learned about different ranks. In the military ranks and officers versus non-commissioned officers was a class system unto itself. While I understood the different ranks, what was and was not allowed because of my father’s rank and how they interacted, I never personalized his rank for myself.

Many children I knew often “wore their fathers’ rank”, meaning they felt they were entitled to certain rights because of what rank their father was in the military. I, on the other hand, rarely mentioned my father’s rank. After all, it was HIS rank not mine. This caused more than one argument with a so-called friend who felt they had the right to know my father’s rank so they could know whether they could be my friend.

This position of dealing with military ranks was endorsed by my parents. My mother had a saying that when my father came home, he left his rank at the door and was simply our father. And so it went as I grew up.

Over the years, I am sure there are people who you have felt intimidated by, either because of their title, position in society or some other factor. While I sometimes recognized these differences, rarely did they affect me. Why? Because my mother had a saying that I still can hear echoed in my head. If I would mention a concern about speaking to someone she would quickly reply, “Don’t worry, they all wipe their butts the same way.” Let’s just say it puts things quickly in perspective if you imagine everyone taking care of their restroom business the same way. In a succinct way she conveyed that we are all ultimately the same, human beings. No one is inherently better than another.

It always amazes me how many people are afraid to speak up for their position or belief because they are afraid they will make someone else uncomfortable or make themselves uncomfortable should there be a confrontation. As a result, people do nothing. They let other people make decisions that will affect their lives. Sometimes they don’t feel they are entitled to speak up while at other times they feel intimidated because of a person’s title or status in society.

After having our daughter I became very involved in legislative work. It involved much time and regular visits to both Congress and our State Capitol. On many occasions our daughter would accompany me, with her earliest legislative experience when she was less than 2 years old. One particular time stands out. I was scheduled to do a television interview and had to meet the crew at the capitol but because it was short notice, I had our daughter with me. I brought along a pack of her favorite animal crackers and a juice box as a treat and prayed that these treats would keep her occupied for several minutes while I did the interview.

As I set up our daughter in a secure area with her cookies and juice box, she watched my interview. While I did the interview, unbeknownst to me a Representative came over and sat next to our daughter. The Representative apparently struck up a conversation with our daughter. It turned out that while I was doing my interview our daughter, who was about five, told the Representative her opinion on certain legislative matters, which she had overheard me discuss.

The Representative was a bit taken back that she was being informed by a five year-old about what she should do legislatively but she did note that our daughter was quite pleasant and polite. While I never officially taught our daughter that “everyone wipes their butt the same way” she had learned that no one was above anyone else. Through my actions, she learned to speak up and have her voice heard, even if she was just five. She was not intimidated by the woman’s position and she has continued to voice her opinions.

So, the next time you contemplate whether to speak up or deal with someone that intimidates you, just close your eyes and imagine them going to the bathroom. After all, as my mother taught me, “They all wipe their butts the same way.” Then take a deep breath and calmly, clearly speak your mind.

So, what do think this is about? Counting? Math? Would you believe it’s about drums? Have you ever wanted to learn something? Maybe you wanted to learn to cook like Julia Child or maybe you wanted to run a marathon? What is YOUR secret thing that you have always wanted to learn to do?

Growing up, I always wanted to learn to play the drums. As a young teen, my parents decided that it would be good for me to take music lessons. When asked what instrument I wanted to play, I said drums. Wouldn’t any self-respecting 12 year-old girl say that? Alright, well most girls probably want to do something else but for this 12 year-old girl the dream was drums.

I was informed that some family relatives protested to my parents that drums were not ladylike and instead I learned to play the guitar. I did enjoy the guitar and got pretty good at it. In junior high and high school I took up the clarinet. No offense to those folks who have always dreamed of playing the clarinet or the guitar but they are a far cry from drums, at least for me.

So, over the years I have continued to quietly feed this drum dream of mine. I often could be found tapping the steering wheel and when alone in the car I would have the stereo blaring anything with some serious drum beats. As far as mothers go, I am probably somewhat unusual but hey, it takes all kinds to make the world go round.

When I met my husband I shared my secret dream and over the years he has wanted to get the drums for me. But with money and space tight, I politely refrained from getting the drums of my dreams. Recently, as we finished organizing and cleaning our basement the drum dream became a real possibility. Money, space and time somewhat came together and as a belated birthday present, I got a seven piece Gretsch metallic blue drum set!

So, for the last week or so I have been beating my drums. I am a far cry from any serious drummer but with the encouragement of my family, I am going to take some lessons. So, what’s the point of this whole entry? What do you think? That children should be encouraged to play an instrument? The only instrument someone should play is drums? Someone with a dream will persevere until they obtain it?

No, the point of this entry is for you to get to know your children and encourage THEIR dreams. As parents we need to encourage their dreams, even if it they may seem impossible or ridiculous to us. Parents need to be our children’s cheerleaders, even if their (or extended family's) choice might not be ours. After all, at the end of their life do you want to hear them say, “I really wish I had done……instead of….” For many famous people the only person who encouraged them, who told them to go on when they faced defeat or challenges, were their parents. Think about it. Will you be the parent that encourages your child’s dreams or inhibits them?

And while you’re thinking about it, I’m going to go down to the basement, crank up the stereo and play my drums! Can you hear them?? One, two, three, four…

What does an address book look like to you? If you are like pretty much anyone on earth you will say it includes lines, name, address, email, and home, cell and work phone numbers. The question is how realistic is that for a young child?

Think about it. If your child can not read, how helpful will an adult address book be? When our daughter was about three she liked to draw pictures to mail to friends and family. She enjoyed doing this because she quickly learned that she would often get mail back from whomever she sent letters to.

One challenge was that she did not know how to spell everyone’s name. So, I came up with a photo address book. My husband and daughter created the photo address book. They took pictures we had of everyone and cut out their face. Then we put their name under their picture. (Digital pictures are very easy to use.) Each page had about 15 to 20 pictures on them. Afterwards, we put the pages in a 3-ring binder

This worked very well and gave her independence. She enjoyed pulling out her photo address book, creating her picture and addressing it to the appropriate party.

This photo address book would also work if you wanted to include the person’s address below, particularly when they are learning to write and address envelopes. The only thing that limits your ability to homeschool is your imagination. With some modification, which is often easier to implement in your home than in a school, many things can be easily presented. Children like copying their parents. What is more adult than their own address book?

Garlic shots, garlic marinated beef on a stick, garlic bread knots, garlic chocolate chip chocolate cookies, garlic mushrooms, garlic jelly, garlic oils, garlic dips, garlic chocolate candy bars, garlic burgers, garlic ice cream, garlic popcorn and the delectable garlic dipped in chocolate fondue. So, did you figure out what they all have in common? Well, yes you are correct, they are all food items, one of my favorite things to experiment with, but that is not what I am referring to.

Have you figured it out? If you said, GARLIC then you would be on to something. Recently, we attended the annual Hudson Valley Garlic Festival in Saugerties, NY and we tried everything just mentioned! We first heard about this festival from some family that lives in the area. So, we decided that we had to investigate this festival dedicated to garlic. Now, I am sure if you are unfamiliar with this website/blog you may be asking yourself what does a garlic festival have to do with homeschooling?

Well, besides the experimenting with many different items made with garlic we learned that there are many different types of garlic. Seriously, until you have tried the white German, red German, red Italian, and French garlic, among others, you have not experimented or explored garlic. Science could easily be incorporated in this learning opportunity and we did include some science in this opportunity.

Of course, one could learn about the economic impact of such an event on a community. By exploring and researching the event, one could learn how the money is used in the community, how the event came about, who contributes to the event and so on.

Then there is the fact that while experimenting with all the food one could learn how to be daring by having a positive attitude and approaching the whole experience as an adventure. While at the garlic festival we had a couple other opportunities to experiment with other foods, venison and alligator gumbo. While our daughter is generally daring with a positive attitude, the venison and alligator somewhat taxed her patience with experimenting. Although, I must say, she did enjoy telling all her friends how she had eaten alligator the next day and seeing their face!

While all of those are great things one could learn from going to a garlic festival, the thing we all took away from the event was just how creative and daring the individuals were who developed some of the garlic uses. After all, can you imagine being the one to come up with the idea to stick garlic in a perfectly good chocolate bar? I mean honestly, what did the friends of this person say? What would your spouse say if you said you came up with a new dessert, garlic cloves dipped in chocolate fondue? Could you keep a straight face if your friend said they had just made some garlic ice cream to add to their pie?

Yet someone came up with each of those ideas. Even if the recipes were passed on from generation to generation, there was someone who was willing to experiment, possibly be laughed at or ridiculed, make mistakes and then try again. Those are amazing lessons and after all isn’t that what learning is all about?

While we have all heard of many people who were willing to fail and try again, the garlic festival offers a unique perspective on this lesson. So, the next time you are afraid to shake things up, try something different, or make a mistake reconsider and remember the garlic festival.

To learn more about the Hudson Valley Garlic Festival visit: http://www.hvgf.org/

Kids love beans. Uncooked that is! Younger children love playing with them because of the sounds they make, their color and the way they feel. This is a great way for developing gross motor skills, manipulation and creativity.

When our daughter was younger she was thrilled whenever I would give her a pot of uncooked beans, a spoon, plastic measuring cup, and a couple bowls or pots. She would spend a good half hour just scooping and pouring them between the pots. They have been included in her pretend restaurant.

For less than a few dollars, beans are a great tool in learning, especially when they are purchased in bulk. They can of course be used for creativity as in imagining the child is cooking but take a moment and think of other uses for this protein?

For younger children they can scoop beans from one pot to a bowl and develop their gross motor skills. As they get older and use a spoon they can develop their hand-eye coordination. If they are given a decent size funnel they can even practice using both of their hands to scoop and hold a funnel.

Pictures can be created used different beans and colors for a collage. The beans can be used as an impetus for hearing the story of Jack and the Beanstalk.

As the children get older they can be used as a math manipulative for counting, sorting, and doing math. Beans can easily be measured by weight. And different colored beans can be used to create a graph.

Different beans can be incorporated into a lesson on different forms of protein. They can be used for home economics by the children when they learn how to cook beans, incorporate them in different recipes and so on. They could even create a bean cookbook with their own recipes, which would then incorporate writing, math and creativity.

For older children, beans can be used as an aid in teaching about different food lifestyles such as vegetarians. They can also be used to learn about different cultures that utilize beans in their diet such as Mexico. There is, of course, the science experiment with growing beans and identifying their parts. Children can learn about the process of picking beans and the countries where different beans grow as part of social studies.

As with the lowly cardboard box, don’t discount the creative and learning opportunities that are presented by such a simple food, the bean. If you have other ideas of how beans can be incorporated into learning please comment below.

Our daughter regularly spends time in creative play. One of the things she enjoys doing is running a pretend restaurant. She created a menu to hand out to her patrons. I offered that we could create menus on the computer if she wanted and she quickly took me up on the offer.

We worked together to design the menu, write the selections, prices and even included pictures. Afterwards, we laminated them using clear contact paper and cut them accordingly. She really enjoyed making them and still uses them in her pretend restaurant.

Recently, she decided to create a family breakfast menu. This time she figured out all of our breakfast options. She designed the cover with our family’s name and titled it “Breakfast Menu”. Then she listed all our drink options, food selections and options for how we wanted our food prepared. Yes, it is quite detailed and she developed it all on her own. We can even decide what number we want our toast heated to for crunchiness. Even condiment selections and spreads, such as butter, jelly or Nutella, were included.

Finally, she folded the menu in half so that there were several pages in a booklet form. She even bound the pages together with yarn. Now, every morning we can select from one of many options. Often times we can even place our orders with her. She runs a real breakfast restaurant in our kitchen and we get to be the lucky recipients of a delectable breakfast prepared just so.

What began as creative play developed into an exciting project, which she initiated. She utilized her design and creativity skills, spelling, penmanship, and writing skills as she described all of our selections. In running her restaurant she learned about maintaining the food stock and often reminds me when we are running low on breakfast items. She also has learned about time management as she sets out to prepare several items at once and finally she has learned about presentation. Breakfast has been delicious and we have never had soggy cereal or burnt toast. Hmmm, maybe that’s why my husband and I like our daughter’s restaurant so much!

Alright, I have to admit it. Next to food, history, and politics one of the subjects that I have always enjoyed was law. Seriously! When I was in high school I worked volunteer for a summer at the local district attorney’s office. It was an educational experience as I assisted the victim’s unit with preparing for court or helped with preparing the judicial pool selection, among other things. It became very personal when I walked into court one day to learn that a boy from my school was going to testify as he had been molested.

I also participated in Law Explorers. The Explorers program is a division of the Boy Scouts of America, which is co-ed and is focused on particular careers. With Law Explorers we would get together monthly and do fun things like putting on a mock trial, listen to prisoners speak, visit the prison and so on. During the mock trials, I got to play the role of the judge several times.

Law was always fascinating because it affected so many people and cases could be won or lost on the finest of detailed arguments. In fact, it was those very fine details that could cause a case to go to the U.S. Supreme Court. Through high school I continued to work at several law firms. I know this will sound very weird but I even had a postcard of the U.S. Supreme Court justices on my mirror. I really wanted to become the 2nd woman U.S. Supreme Court justice and every day I would be reminded of my dream.

As the years went by I decided that I wanted a family and time with them more and so I let those dreams move on. Nonetheless, I still relish reading a good legal transcript and can understand legal contracts enough that I have thankfully caught more than my share of errors prior to signing legal documents.

So, with this understanding I will share our daughter’s learning experience regarding the judicial system, prisoners and the paddy wagon. One morning on our way home from a doctor’s visit, we came upon a Department of Corrections transportation vehicle. I realized immediately that they were headed to court coming from one of the prisons. As we continued, I figured this would be a great time to talk with our daughter about the law, court and prisoners.

I asked my husband if he would follow the van so we could see if I was right. As we followed, we began a discussion. I asked her what she thought the van was for and why did it have bars? Who might be in it? Why were they there? Where were they going? I explained that there were prisoners in the van and that they were on their way to court. We talked about how when someone does something wrong, they can end up in jail. In those cases, they will appear before a judge to decide if bail will be set. For other people who are awaiting trial they will go to a prison and then be transported back to court for their trial.

Our discussion continued with me asking more questions. How are the prisoners arranged in the van? Do you think prisoners ever try to get out and break free? How would they do it? How can only one or two guards transport many prisoners? We talked about safety, the use of bars, escapes and proper planning when transporting prisoners.

“What happens when they get to the court?” I asked. Our daughter was unsure and so I explained that the court has a big garage. The prisoner van drives into it, it is met by other guards, the garage door is closed and then the prisoners are led out in handcuffs and leg chains. Considering we drive by the courthouse all the time, our daughter had never noticed this garage. So, what’s a homeschool mother to do?

I asked my husband to follow the paddy wagon all the way to the courthouse. While he had agreed to go along with following the van on the highway, he looked at me as though I had three heads when I made the last request. He agreed to follow the van but was concerned that the guard who was driving was beginning to get suspicious of us following him. I assured him that there was nothing to worry about, after all we were not doing anything illegal, even if we did look a little odd following the van.

So, we followed the van off the highway, took the same turn at the light as the van, continued up Main St. behind him and managed to hit every light with the van right in front of us. At this point, we could see that the driver kept looking in his side mirror. My husband was becoming more uncomfortable but we were able to convince him to continue following the van, down another road and through several more lights. Then we came to the courthouse. As we drove up behind the van, we saw the garage door open and the van pull in. Success! The van was going to the courthouse.

As we drove off, my husband breathed a sigh of relief that this learning adventure was over, as I am sure the driver of the van did too. We continued talking about law and prisoners. Our daughter contemplated what it must be like to lose your rights, have a judge decide your future, not be allowed to come and go as you please and so on. In that time, we were able to take a seemingly innocuous van and teach some valuable lessons. Our daughter learned about the judicial system, laws, crime, rights, responsibility, good citizenship, dangers of particular professions, and how one single decision one makes can change many lives. All-in-all it was one adventure we won’t soon forget!

What did you do with the box that you recently received at home? Ever wonder what happens to all the boxes at the stores and grocery stores? When was the last time you used a box? Was it for moving or storage? If you are like most adults, you overlook the measly cardboard box. After all, once it serves its purpose what use is it?

There are many uses for a box beyond moving, storage or shipping. A simple box can become an imaginary car, train, sled or ship. It can be used for a table or desk when flipped over. This can then be used for the purpose of an imaginary restaurant, dining room table, or grocery store counter. Larger boxes can be used for huts or tents. Most boxes just get crushed once they serve their purpose so why not ask for a box to bring home. If you are looking for a larger box, check appliance stores.

While the main learning experience will be the use of your child’s creativity and imagination, many other lessons can be incorporated. If your child is very young you could ask them to tell you a story using their box as a car, for example. You could record their story or transcribe it and help them create a book. Then you could read the story they wrote.

If the child is older you could ask them to write a story with a beginning such as: “One day, I sat in a box which magically became ….” Now, spelling, creativity, writing, and English can be incorporated. Another option might be to set up a grocery store using the box. Let the child practice selling items and making change with real money. This allows them to practice communication skills, math and entrepreneurship.

For older children you could invite them to decorate the box and collect cans for the homeless shelter or treats for the troops overseas. In these situations, they get to use many skills while learning the following: - Communication and persuasion skills can be developed while doing the collecting. - Math can be used for weighing and measuring so that packing can be done properly. - Geography can be used to locate the place to which the box will be shipped. - Current events as to what is going on in that part of the world and why the box is needed there. - Good citizenship can be learned by helping their fellow man. - If they drop off the box to a homeless shelter or food pantry, they can learn about how one can be in poverty, organizations that help individuals who are in poverty, whether it is the government’s responsibility to get people out of poverty, and other ways to help.

So, the next time you see a measly box bring it home for your kids. You will be amazed at the fun and learning that can take place for less than a $1.00.

If you have others ideas of how a box can be used be sure to click on comments and share your ideas!

A couple years ago we moved into a different house. With a fenced in yard, quieter neighborhood, better section of town and more space, we were thrilled. The first year here we made a serious effort to get to know our neighbors. We even had a cookout and invited them all over.

This spring though, our patience began to wear thin with some of the neighborhood kids. Several of the boys decided to harass our daughter while she played in our backyard. The harassment included provoking and inappropriate language and exposing their chests while describing themselves as “sexy” to our daughter. Might I say, they are thirteen and our daughter is merely eight.

While my husband and I confronted the boys and told them to leave our daughter alone, their harassment continued. Part of the challenge was that she was concerned with hurting their feelings to which we repeatedly pointed out that they didn’t care about her feelings. Another part of the challenge was they would always run whenever my husband or I would come out. So, we decided that we needed to assist her in figuring out how to handle the situation.

As a woman, my suggestion was to ignore them. Let’s face it sometimes members of the opposite sex can be inappropriate and rude. Arguing with them will not teach them but rather it will egg them on to continue. While ignoring them takes away the pleasure for them of knowing they were annoying. My husband explained how boys generally think and agreed that ignoring them would be the best approach.

Then it occurred to me, this would be a great opportunity for her to learn from others. So, we gave her an assignment. She was to think of five women whose opinion she valued and ask them the following questions. 1. Had you ever been harassed by boys when you were a girl? 2. How did you handle it when they would tease or harass you? 3. Have you ever been harassed by a man as a woman?

She set out over the next weeks to discover the answers. Each time a brief explanation was given about the situation and she asked the women if they minded answering a few questions. In every situation, the women (all either friends or family) were pleased to be consulted.

While the answers varied the most common response given was to just walk away, ignore them and get your parent if it continued. One suggested that perhaps our daughter should tell the boys that if the boys were so “sexy” then they wouldn’t be picking on her because they would have a girlfriend. Another explained that she would slam the boy harassing her against a locker when she was in school! The most learning occurred during each discussion.

One good friend is the only female in her house. As she took time for our daughter her husband and son looked at her differently during the discussion as they realized that she was a woman not just one of the guys. Our daughter learned different ways of handling these boys. She realized this would be a situation she may confront at different times in her life and it was good to stand up for herself. She sought different opinions and thoughtfully analyzed each response. She learned that it is good to consult different people who may have expertise in an area and learned different communication skills.

In the end, after another incident which my husband was not present for, I made it clear to the boys that they were not welcome to step foot on our property again or to speak to our daughter. I also made it clear that should they violate either of those rules, the next call would be to the police and an officer would be speaking with them and their parents. From this, our daughter learned that it is ok for a woman to be firm and contact the police if necessary. Needless to say, it was a quieter summer. Thank goodness!

Unlike previous generations, most of us were not raised to be seen but not heard. Yet many of us assume the belief that as parents our beliefs and authority can not be questioned. Now I am not advising that children should be allowed to question everything we recommend or require as parents, otherwise everything would result in philosophical discussion.

What I am talking about is at a deeper level. Are you a political party affiliation because your parents were? Are you a particular religion because your parents were? Are you concerned that if you changed political parties or religions you would be disowned? If so, who are you really helping?

Growing up I was never held back when learning opportunities presented themselves. In particular, I attended a Jewish confirmation, a Morman play, Ukrainian Orthodox masses, Russian Orthodox masses, a Baptist marriage, and I dated a guy that was Buddhist who prayed at his shrine daily. As a practicing Catholic, these experiences allowed me to examine my beliefs, ask questions with no pressure to believe one way or another and in the end, each experience cemented my personal beliefs.

Recently, I was reminded of an incident that seriously affected me. After high school, I moved north to go to college and my family of origin was stationed overseas. Soon after, one of my best friends came to visit and we went to my church. As we sat in the back of the church, about half way through the mass my friend jumped up and ran out of the church crying. As my boyfriend (now husband) and I looked at each other surprised we quickly left to check on my friend. She shared that she felt uncomfortable in my church and that it was raising many questions for her.

I realized that day how fortunate I had been to have parents that did not force their beliefs onto me but rather presented opportunities for me to experience different religions while being consistently raised in one. While I will admit, I never learned enough about each religion to have a full understanding of that religion, it did give me a concrete experience for me to reflect on as I studied different religions in school and personally.

Recently, our daughter and I were driving in the car and listening to political talk radio when my daughter asked a thought-provoking question, “Mom, would you still love me if I do not believe the same things you do?” My answer was, “Yes, as long as you think about your beliefs, ask questions, get information, and make an educated decision. And make sure you don’t pick the opposite of me ‘just because’.” I further explained, “Sometimes people do the opposite of someone ‘just because’ they feel like it, perhaps they want to experiment or just be different. The problem with doing the opposite ‘just because’ is that there is no logical rational. With no logical rational, people are just acting on emotion and emotion can get you in trouble.”

We continued the discussion and I assured her that no matter what she does or decides to believe in, I will always love her as long as she really examines her conscious. I wanted to free her from any expectations. I see so many adults living their lives to fulfill their parents’ expectations and often neither the parents of the adults nor the adults are happy. While it is the adults’ ultimate responsibility to live their lives as they believe they should, the truth is that if parents let go of their expectations children could flourish much quicker.

As I thought about my experiences, my friend and my daughter it occurred to me that as parents we are challenged. We want our kids to do the best, but what is the “right” way to be? If we always tell our children what to believe, what they will do when they grow up, what they should feel and how to be as humans are we really helping them?

The truth, as I see it, is that we are here to guide our children. Encourage them to explore. Learn to ask questions and where to seek answers. Analyze the answers and ultimately make an educated decision. The truth is that teaching critical thinking can be one of the greatest gifts we give our children. So, the next time you are on the verge of telling your child what they should think for every part of their life, remember you aren’t helping them think at all. You are just creating a robot and over time robots break down, often at the most inopportune time.

Critical thinking is key to learning. It encompasses very important subjects such as religion but also what to do when a friend tries to pressure them. It is what allowed scientists to recently recognize that Pluto is not a planet. Critical thinking allows one to discern marketing claims in a television commercial from the truth. It allows one to question just how does a scientist know how old a dinosaur really is or what they really looked like? In short, critical thinking allows them to think for themselves.

Homeschooling is the perfect avenue for encouraging critical thinking. Thought provoking conversations and analysis can ensue over dinner or in the car. As a parent, you have the opportunity to share your position. And with no legal restrictions, as in public schools, you can assist your child in completing a full analysis of all sides of an issue. In addition, you can include expert opinions from both sides of an issue by utilizing different media including books, magazines, Internet, radio and television. With homeschooling you can even include resources such as the bible or other religious text where warranted, which is often forbidden in public schools.

Critical thinking is as important as any single subject for without critical thinking no subject can be truly understood and no child can really grow up to be the best they can be. So, don’t be afraid to have your beliefs questioned, your child is not saying you are a bad parent but rather they are trying to better understand the world they live in. Calmly answering their questions and guiding them through the critical thinking process helps them to learn to truly analyze issues that they will face in their life. Besides wouldn’t you rather your child ask you the questions instead of someone who doesn’t know your child very well or care?

So, when you are pregnant and you are thinking of what name to give your pending bundle of joy, do you really think about when they are going to have to learn how to spell the name? Do you ever think about writing your little baby’s name on their 7th birthday cake around 7 candles? If you are like me, you did not think about any of that. The only thing that I was concerned about was how it sounded and did it match the child that I was looking at in my arms.

Well, fast forward to the first birthday. We didn’t name our daughter Alexandrina, an 11 letter name, but we came darn close with a 10 letter name. Growing up, my mother made all of our birthday cakes. Our family tradition was that we could request any cake for our birthday. Quite a good deal if you know what I mean! So, when our daughter turned one, I decided to continue the tradition and make and decorate the cake. As I stood at our kitchen decorating her birthday cake, I prepared to write out her 10 letter name. I estimated the size of the letters and spacing and set to work. By the fourth letter it dawned on me, what the heck had I done to this poor child with giving her such a long name? She would never learn to spell her name!

Later as I was chatting with my Mom, I reminisced about my realization to which she replied that was one of the reasons why she had given me a short name-Lisa! Great! Clearly, neither my husband nor I were thinking clearly following childbirth. So, over the next couple years, I figured out different solutions for the birthday cakes which included, ta-da, getting a bigger birthday cake!

As our daughter began to learn to spell her name, she came to us one day and said, “Why did you give me such a long name? I’ll never learn to spell my name!” Super! What’s a Mom to do? Change their child’s name? Give them a nickname? (I always refused to call her a nickname because I figured I had worked darn hard to have her and by golly I would call her, her given name selected by us, her most wise parents.)

On top of that how do you get a homeschooled child to learn their name when they don’t need to turn in papers with their name on them, as they would in public or private school? Since I am not a fan of making one do work just for the sake of doing it with no rational behind the work, I had to think of a reason for her to learn her name sooner than later. Not only that but I wanted her to want to do it and I had to figure out a reason quickly.

One day at the library it dawned on me. If she could write her name, she could get a library card. A-ha! I had brilliantly conceived of a reason for her to learn to write her name. So, that day I explained that as soon as she could write her whole name without any help from us, she could get her own library card!

She was so exited at the prospect that she set out to learn her double digit name. Within a couple weeks she announced she was ready to get her library card. So, on our next trip to the library she made the attempt to write her 10 letter name on a 1 ½ inch line. With focused intensity while biting her lip, she carefully printed her name. She presented the completed form to the librarian for approval. After the librarian checked the form she told my daughter that she would get her library card. Our daughter was so excited and so was I! She immediately checked out some books and came home to show off her card to my husband.

Fortunately, with some creative quick thinking I was able to come up with a reason as to why she needed to learn how to write her name sooner than later. As for all of you new parents-to-be thinking about your child’s name, either go for a short name or plan on eating extra cake every year so you can fit your child’s name on the cake!

Our grocery store has in-store childcare. Yes, you read that correctly. But unlike some parents who want a reprieve from their children or their children who want a reprieve from their parents, our family regularly uses the grocery store for educational endeavors. Let’s face it the grocery store is a great place to learn.

One subject that can easily be taught is math. When our daughter was just learning to add multiple numbers and numbers past 100, we introduced her to the idea of rounding numbers. We practiced with different dollar amounts and rounding them up or down to the nearest dollar. So, the $1.59 of apples rounded to $2.00 and so on.

With this understanding of rounding, we set off for the grocery store. With a pencil, pad of paper and small clip board in hand, our daughter set out to determine our approximate bill for the groceries. Now, I will admit I could have done all the grocery shopping in about one hour, including paying and getting the groceries bagged, but what a real world opportunity would our daughter have missed.

So, instead of one hour total, it took almost two hours our first time around. As the cashier rang up our order, our daughter paid close attention to the amounts and the final total. She was very excited once we reviewed the receipt and found that she was within a couple dollars of the final total. I was excited because she found a real world reason for learning math and I stayed within my budget.

Since that first time, she has rounded many more of our orders. She has become so efficient at this that we can get through our entire grocery shopping experience within a little over an hour.

As she tackled several digit numbers she became more precise in the adding. She now adds multiple digit numbers, without rounding, and aims for an accurate subtotal, without the use of a calculator. She does a great job and is very helpful with keeping us on track for our grocery budget.

As she progresses with her math, she will be able to utilize multiplication and division. So, the next time you want to teach math, don’t have your child do a worksheet take some time and teach them using the real world. In the end, not only are they getting some time with you and practicing their math skills but they are also learning a life skill and that is staying within a budget!

As with Cultural Club, which I previously explained, I began something called Cultural Co-op. A co-op is where multiple families gather together either once a month, weekly or more to share resources. Often the sharing of resources takes the form of different expertise. So, for example, if there is a parent who is from China they may teach Chinese or a parent who enjoys science may teach some science lessons.

As with Cultural Club, the purpose of the Cultural Co-op is to investigate different cultures. With the co-op each family in the co-op takes a week and teaches about a specific country or state. They can teach about the country’s history, geography, currency, famous monuments or politics. They can utilize videos, books, food samples, dance, game or songs. Basically anything about the country can be taught in any form.

Recently, our cultural co-op, which meets during what we call Monday Classes because we meet for 8-weeks on Mondays, decided to explore the different cultures of each of our 50 states in the U.S. As someone who grew up in Alabama I decided to introduce this very southern state to these northern kids. But I did not want to do a cursory explanation and so I decided to tackle teaching the Civil Rights Era.

Now some would say 6 to 10 year-olds should not be taught about that era because at times it was very violent. I disagree. The overriding concepts can be taught without teaching about every detail of violence. It was with this premise that I prepared for teaching Alabama.

When I was in college I took many sociology classes. While I learned a lot, I found them more fun because of the many social experiments we were assigned. To this day, I still remember my Professor’s name. One day she broke up the class to teach about class systems and racism. The blue and brown-eyed experiment, as it is known, was first introduced the day after Martin Luther King Jr. was assassinated in 1968 by Jane Elliott to her group of then third graders. The experiment works by dividing the class into the blue-eyed and brown-eyed groups. I decided I would use this experiment to help me teach about the Civil Rights Era.

Since our class was smaller than a regular class I slightly modified the racism experiment. Before I began I explained the purpose to the parents and asked if anyone would have a challenge. All of the parents thought it would be a great learning experience for the kids. When the children arrived, I quickly divided the class by eye color. I only explained that we were going to do an experiment. They were to leave the classroom and re-enter but this time I wanted the blue-eyed kids to walk through the door that was closer to the table. The brown-eyed kids were to walk through the door further away from the table.

When the children walked in, slightly confused, I told them that the blue-eyed kids could sit at the head of the table, while the brown-eyed children would have to sit in the middle. Then I presented PBS video excerpts from “Eyes on the Prize”. Most libraries have this video. As we began I told the blue-eyed kids they would determine when we could start and stop the video. As the video played, I explained certain aspects of the Civil Rights Era. We discussed what it was, why it began, how the black citizens organized, why they marched and did sit-ins, how they succeeded and so on.

I then offered some traditional Alabama foods including pecan pie and a recipe from the Alabama First Lady Patsy Riley, which is included below. Since the racism experiment continued the blue-eyed kids decided who would get served, who could eat first and when they would be done. While the complete experiment lasts two days, ours only lasted about 40 minutes. Nonetheless the kids understood the point. The brown-eyed kids became very irritated that they could not eat when they wanted, had to walk in through a different door, sit in a less desirable section of the table and had no say in the video among other things. The blue-eyed kids became very uncomfortable. Since this is not how they are raised, they did not like making those decisions. And even with a small group of kids the blue-eyed quickly became uncomfortable with hurting their friends.

In the end, I explained how the blue-eyed kids represented the whites while the brown-eyed kids represented the blacks during the Civil Rights Era. (This could be adapted to any type of discrimination, based on race, ethnicity, religion, sex or educational choices.) We then discussed the following. -What is racism? -How did it feel to not be able to do what you wanted as a brown-eyed? -How did it feel to make every decision as the blue-eyed? -As a brown-eyed did you feel like you were being singled out just because you had brown-eyes? -How did it feel to the blacks in the 60’s who were not allowed to sit anywhere on the bus? -Why do you think the blacks walked so many miles to and from work instead of taking the buses? -Would you have wanted to live during that time? Why or why not? -Were the sit-ins, bus boycotts and marches effective? -What did you learn? -Is there anything you would change? -How can you make a difference today in dealing with other people of different races?

In the end, the children gained a better understanding of a tumultuous time in our history, learned about Alabama and decided they did not like or agree with racial discrimination. Someday they will learn all the details of the Civil Rights Era but for now they got it. They learned that discrimination on any level is not right. With understanding they can make a difference in the world.

The following is the recipe from the Alabama First Lady Patsy Riley:

Fresh Tomatoes 3 large tomatoes or more ½ c. white cooking wine 1 c. shredded mozzarella cheese ½ c. Italian breadcrumbs

Cut tomatoes. Place on cookie sheet that has been sprayed with garlic-flavored spray. Spray tomatoes lightly. Sprinkle with shredded mozzarella cheese and Italian breadcrumbs. Pour white cooking wine over each slice. Bake for 10 minutes or until cheese melts.

In case you have not figured it out one thing I really enjoy is food. But not fast food or the typical American diet. I really enjoy experimenting by tasting different foods. Fortunately, I have been blessed to have found a husband that is as daring as I and so we often try different restaurants and cuisines.

About four years ago, we visited a Thai restaurant, which has since become a favorite. As I savored my coconut soup it dawned on me that our homeschool group should have a Cultural Club. After all, considering the United States is a melting pot we have a unique opportunity to experience different cultures without even leaving our country. At the same time, I really feel that many children are never given the opportunity to experiment different cuisines. Sometimes it is because the parents are uncomfortable while other times the children are not daring enough to experiment.

While Americans are very tolerant of different nationalities most Americans are not really familiar with these individuals’ countries of origin. As a military brat (for those not familiar with that terminology, that means the child of military personnel), we often had different people for dinner. When we lived overseas, we became friends with the locals. When we lived in the U. S. we often hosted people from different countries at our home for dinner. It made for some interesting times.

While I was just a kid during these experiences, I did learn two things. First, I was representing American kids to these foreign individuals. Meaning, they thought that how I behaved was how most American kids behaved. While this might seem unrealistic the truth is that whether one agrees or not, people often make a judgment call of a group of people based on their interactions with just a few. Second, I needed to be respectful of their culture. Meaning, if we were eating in a restaurant in a foreign country it was unacceptable that if I did not like a meal for me to say, “Ew, that was disgusting.” And so I learned early on that just because I didn’t like something didn’t mean it was not good or that the person did not make it the best they could. It just meant that I was unaccustomed to that type of food.

With these premises I began the Cultural Club. This can also be done as a family. We try to meet once per month at a different restaurant. So, far we have enjoyed Thai, Mexican, Chinese, Japanese, Brazilian, Vietnamese, Polish, Cuban and Irish food. In order for someone to participate, they must meet a couple requirements. First, they can be any age as long as they know how to behave in a restaurant. In this situation, we meet for lunch and therefore are representing homeschoolers. Second, if a child does not like some of the food they select they must know how to respond respectfully. This is important because we have come to their restaurant. The owners, cooks and staff are sharing part of their culture with us. Therefore, if one doesn’t like some of the food, they can simply say, “This isn’t my favorite.”

Then I send out a list of questions which I find by doing some research on the country. The idea is for the kids and parents to learn about the country. The answers can then be found with a little research online. The following are the questions from our recent trip to a Thai restaurant.

Thailand Questions 1. Where does the restaurant Sukhothai get its name? 2. What currency does Thailand use? 3. Where was the current King of Thailand born? 4. Has Thailand always been a democracy? 5. Was Thailand ever colonised? 6. What is Sepak Takraw? 7. What does the drink Red Bull have in common with Thailand? 8. What is a Tuk Tuk? 9. What is tuk ke? Does anyone eat ching chok? 10. Are women allowed to touch a Monk? 11. How do Thai people gesture hello?

Occasionally, something happens with the country that we are leaning about and it allows for more discussion. This was the case with Thailand recently. Since Thailand was experiencing a coup, we talked about what a coup was, why a country would have a coup, what it must be like for the people to have tanks roll down the street, what the outcome might be and so on. Everyone, regardless of age, is encouraged to bring some unique fact to the lunch.

While our goal is to learn something about the different countries and taste different cuisines we also have fun. Our discussion regarding the country usually lasts a short time and often different conversations follow. As a way of encouraging each person to take in the restaurant décor, music and food, I offer them a restaurant survey. Then one of us writes up a couple paragraphs for publication in our homeschool support newsletter about the experience, what we learned and the survey results.

Cultural Club has been a great way to introduce different countries through food, décor, questions, and music. At the same time, the children often decide to experiment with new cuisines as they see their friends do so. They are encouraged to use their critical skills since their input is sought in ranking the restaurant for the newspaper review. Finally, they get to socialize, represent homeschoolers and learn new ways of expressing their likes and dislikes. And of course, did I mention we enjoy the food too!

When our daughter was almost 5, I would take her to the weekly library storytime. It was another way to introduce her to all sorts of books, songs, little plays and activities. One day as the kids did a cutting activity, I overheard two mothers talking about how their children were going to school shortly for kindergarten. There was nothing unusual about that until they started talking about how neither of their children could cut using scissors! When I heard this I was dumbfounded.

We had always known we would homeschool and we have always felt that all children are gifted in different subjects or areas. As such, my husband and I have always assumed the responsibility to help our daughter figure out her where she was gifted. So, as I sat there that day on the floor of the library listening to these two mothers I could not help but wonder, was my kid gifted in cutting with scissors?

Surely this did not seem like a gift but as I listened the mothers continued to lament about the scissor situation and so I decided to offer an idea. I shared how when our daughter was between 2 and 3, I would give her a bucket of scrap paper and a very, very dull pair of plastic scissors and she would proceed to rip and cut the paper into different designs. I showed her how to use the scissors, what not to do with the scissors and how to carry the scissors, even though they couldn’t have stabbed anything. Then left her to her own accord to cut and rip as she was seriously engrossed in the activity. (While the scissors moved properly they were so dull that often she would be lucky if she got one decent cut out of them.)

This usually entertained her for 30 minutes or so. Then she would present me with cut/ripped paper and declare it to be a shape of something or other. Dutifully, I would hang it on my office cork board and date it as our daughter looked on smiling. This cutting and ripping continued once or twice a month. As she got older she got a metal pair of dull scissors, then a metal pair of pointed scissors and so on.

The mothers both politely listened and then one said, “Yea, but then it just makes such a mess.” The other mother responded, “I agree. I don’t have time to clean up more things.”

At that moment I had a flash of insight as though a bolt of lightening had just hit in front of me. I realized that my child wasn’t gifted in cutting with scissors; I just wasn’t more concerned about how the house looked than in giving our daughter the opportunity to learn and make a mess.

As I tried to stay calm, because I couldn’t believe that someone would not give a child the opportunity to learn because they might make a mess, I pointed out that the mess actually presented another learning activity. Cleaning up! I explained that each time after our daughter was done, I would make a game of cleaning up the paper and our daughter would participate as she was expected to do.

At this point, the mothers gave me a bewildering look. It was then that I realized that someone so concerned about their appearance, including their home, did not care to take the time to teach their child or allow them to learn on their own. I don’t know whatever happened to those mothers and children but it did reaffirm in my mind that a perfect home is not nearly as important as a child that learns to experiment, even if it makes a mess. After all, the second lesson of learning that it is their responsibility to clean up is a lesson as a parent I most enjoy today!

Some kids are friendly. Some are bullies. And then some can be so concerned about others feelings that it can become almost a fault. Our daughter falls into the third category but is working on getting out of it with our help.

Our daughter knows that it is very important to speak up in life. After all if you want to accomplish something, move forward, be taken seriously, have your opinions heard, or just not get walked all over you have to speak up. I learned this very important lesson from my mother. She grew up to be seen and not heard and decided early on that I would be encouraged and allowed to speak up. As a result, I was encouraged to speak up and over time learned this lesson well, sometimes to my parent’s dismay.

While it occasionally caused problems at home with me always having an opinion, it came in handy when I was dating or when I had a problem with a store. Part of learning to speak up is knowing what you believe in. At a most basic level it is what your principles are.

Principles are defined as a basic truth, a rule or standard of personal conduct or a moral or ethical standard. Having principles is a good thing. Otherwise one can fall to the winds of peer pressure. One of my Mom’s sayings when she wanted to make this point usually went something like, “Just because Jenny jumped in the lake, would you do it to?”

As parents we try to impart certain principles, such as no stealing, respecting family, no smoking, no bullying, sharing, dressing modestly, etc. We hope that our children embrace these principles so that when we are not present they will not follow “Jenny into the lake” and get into trouble.

Our daughter is very kind hearted and as a result, we have worked to teach her that being kind does not mean not listening to her intuition or allowing herself to get walked all over or pushed around. This has been a serious mission for me, particularly, because I often see women who are so afraid to speak up they won’t even ask for directions to a bathroom in a store just because they don’t want to bother someone.

While I don’t believe one needs to be a bully or pushy to convey their point, I do think that everyone has the right to respect. As such, one has the right to speak up. So, when a child in our daughter’s martial arts class took an intentional kick below the belt to hurt our daughter, I insisted she speak up even though she was afraid the other kid would get in trouble. In the end, the other child was just watched more closely and our daughter learned she must speak up.

Recently, when a conflict arose with one of her friends she felt she could not tell her friend what she thought otherwise it would hurt her friend’s feelings. And so, we taught our daughter what we quickly and brilliantly dubbed the “Principle Lesson”.

The “Principle Lesson” begins with the premise that one has principles that they live by. One such principle might be no stealing. Using this principle imagine one day you are out with your friends and they tell you they are going to steal something from the store. You do nothing about it. You do not act on your principles. The friend steals some items, gets into the car with you, you drive off and the police shortly thereafter pull you over. While you would also be held legally responsible because you knew prior to the criminal act, you would have also violated your principle.

The truth is, as we explained to our daughter during an outdoor homeschooling moment on the patio, if you follow your principles you most likely will not get into trouble. If you don’t know what your principles are you will cave in to peer pressure. (Yes, homeschoolers have peer pressure also, just not as severely.) If you don’t know what your principles are you will fall for anything. We reminded her that not standing up for her principles only hurts her. Then we explained she must decide now, before she gets into an awkward or dangerous situations, what her principles are so that she will be able to act on them quickly and not have to think.

Otherwise, as my Mom taught me you might not only get soaking wet following Jenny into the lake but you might end up in some real trouble that could be life changing, like following Jenny to jail.

Alright, I have to admit I really enjoy geography! It is amazing to go to different countries, witness their way of life, meet people and taste the country’s cuisine. Did I mention it is great trying the food??? Growing up I had some amazing opportunities since my Dad was in the military. Not many folks can say they saw the Berlin wall before and after it came down, unless you lived in Berlin or traveled a ton. It was truly amazing to witness the destruction of the Berlin wall.

Unfortunately, traveling for many is not that easy. Our family really enjoys the Amazing Race television show. Their travels throughout the world are a unique way to introduce geography without even leaving your house. As Amazing Race became a form of entertainment for our family, I decided I needed to make it educational. Of course, there were many educational angles I could have seized upon. There were the relationship dynamics, the contestants ability to listen to each other, follow directions, and figure out a way to function in a foreign country but the one I thought was superb was geography.

So, when we watch Amazing Race we use TiVo. (If you don’t have TiVo, a VCR tape works just as well.) We regularly pause the show, pull out the globe and identify where the contestants are going. We try to figure out what is special about that country, either politically, geographically, socially, historically, and so on.

As we progress through the show we also fast forward through the commercials. If our daughter does not understand what is going on or why the spot was selected we discuss the reason for that destination. There have been times that I was at the exact location that they are filming from and on those occasions, I can’t help but pull out tourism books which inevitably lead to a longer discussion. In the end, in one hour we get no commercials and a geography lesson. Now, if I could only figure out a way for food samples from the country they are visiting to be delivered to our door, we could have a five senses experience! Hmmm. I’m going to have to work on that one.

What began last Thanksgiving weekend as a simple trip to the pet store to get some treats for our two dogs, Rocky and Julius, became a life lesson in the art of persuasion. Let’s face it every aspect of our life is affected by our ability to persuade. When I was on debate team this was an intricate part of our training.

Think about it. You want to see one movie and your spouse wants to see another. How well can you persuade your spouse to watch your movie selection? What about your boss? Maybe you have a big project that needs to get done but you believe it should be one way and your boss thinks it should be done differently. How well can you persuade your boss to see and act on your position? The reality is if you have mastered the art of persuasion, you will also be able to increase your ability to negotiate.

Well children (and Moms, I must admit) practice persuasion, even at home. This particular weekend, my daughter and I decided we would window shop while we were on vacation. En route to the downtown area we stopped at a pet store to get something for our dogs. At most pet stores there are the animal aisles of food, treats and supplies. Besides the fish or rabbits at different times of year, rarely are other animals available for sale unless it is a mall pet store. Hence my selection of this pet store. When we walked in to the pet store we were surprised to see dogs available for sale.

Among the many breeds that were available for sale, there were some Pomeranians. If you aren’t familiar with this dog they usually don’t get any bigger than about 10 lbs., they have a lot of fur, and they always cock their head from one side to another. We had never seen a Pomeranian and my daughter and I were quickly taken with their size, friendly personality and general cuteness. Now I have to admit that we are fans of mutts, as our other two dogs are mutts, but these Pomeranians quickly stole our heart.

As I tried desperately to regain control of the situation, I set out in search of the treats that we initially had come for and my daughter followed in tow. While our daughter has been taught that no means no and badgering will not work, in this case she decided to practice her persuasive abilities immediately.

“Mom, can we get the Pomeranian?” “No, your father would never go for that after us bringing home Julius.” “Mom, can we call Dad and ask him?” “No, your father and I agreed we will not get anymore dogs. Two is more than enough.” “Mom, can’t you just call Dad and ask him?” “No, I don’t have the phone.” “Can we go get it?” she asked.

And so the conversation continued. Finally, out of desperation I told her I would call my husband. I foolishly decided that if I told my husband we got the dog and then our daughter heard his response then she would see why we could not get the dog.

Instead, my husband while surprised stayed serenely calm and simply responded with, “Uh-uh, no you didn’t?”. When we got home he asked where the dog was. At that point, I had to admit that I had tried to trick him. Immediately, our daughter then began trying to persuade my husband. (Now, I do have to admit that I did extol the virtues of this tiny Pomeranian puppy and well, I did ask if we could get the puppy too.)

The next day, my husband agreed to stop and look at the dogs on our way to lunch. The persuasive tactics had worked so effectively that he agreed we could get a Pomeranian if he could get a Sheltie. Now, my head was spinning. Could it be we came on vacation with two dogs and we were going to leave with four? Had we totally lost our mind?

In the end, we learned the Sheltie was promised to another family. As for us, we came home with a sable Pomeranian puppy who we named Teddy. He looks like a teddy bear and in his lineage (yes, he has a family tree) the “Grand Sire” was named Weeks Wild Teddy Bear. So, in honor of President Theodore Roosevelt, he was nicknamed Teddy.

The experience included learning about family lineage, a new breed of dog, how to care for a puppy, and the differences between purebreds and mutts. But the biggest lesson learned that weekend was just how effective the art of persuasion can be used.

As for this Thanksgiving, I think we’ll bring the dog treats from home!